SaVing a LiFe

How was everyone’s break? I gladly asked, the first day back at school after Christmas break? All the kids excitedly shouted and began rambling about what Santa brought them. Some explained about the latest video games they received as others rambled about their fun family vacations.


Not Tommy, Tommy was real quite in the back of the classroom with a disappointed look on his face. When the bell rang and all the kids stomped out of class, I held Tommy back and asked, hey! Tommy, what did Santa bring you? He replied, nothing Miss. Garcia, lowering his head. I asked him, well, why not? Were you a bad boy this year? He rapidly answered, well I got my first B in math class last report card, but even if I got all A’s, I am too over weight to be rewarded at home.

I opened my eyes in a surprised glare and asked, who said that Tommy? My dad did, he replied. Dad tells me that fat boys don’t get ahead in life, that our society only likes those who are physically fit and therefore, Santa did not stop by, cause he’d knew I’d probably eat all his cookies.
I did not know what to say. I stared at him speechless and wondered what kind of parent says such a comment to their child? I paused and said, Tommy, where is your mom? He replied, she passed away when I was born. I live with my father and our maid Maria.

I thought back and remembered when I had sent Tommy on timeout for pushing his class mate after only being asked, if he was going to eat both his cookies?
And then it all made sense to me, Tommy had psychological and emotional disturbance because of his weight and the anguish it caused him at home with his father. I suddenly felt hopeless and thought about Tommy and his pain all night when I arrived at home.

The next day, I brought a few video games and some trucks I had bought my nephew for his upcoming birthday and I wrapped them in Christmas paper and handed them to Tommy after class. I explained to him that Santa had dropped off some presents in my class room and that I had not noticed till today.

I wrote a note as if it was written by Santa, it read:

Dear, Tommy
You are a bright boy. I have been watching you through out the year and I have noticed all your frowns. Santa likes happy boys and your upside down smile has made me a bit sad. I dropped your presents off at Miss Garcia’s classroom because that is where most your smiles take place. Tommy, do you think I am over weight? I was only wondering, because I heard you say one time that society only likes those who are physically fit. Is that so? Because ALL the kids and families love me for who I am. So I don’t think that comment is quite accurate. Well, continue being a good boy, and remember, It’s about who you are that makes you wonderful not about what one person thinks is socially accepted. Merry Christmas.


Tommy’s face lid up with a huge smile, it broke my heart. He turned to me and said, Miss Garcia, Santa brought me presents! He said I should be accepted for who I am. I replied, yes Tommy, it is about who you are not about the so called “accepted” look. He looked at me and said, Miss tonight I was going to go home and fill my tub with water and fall asleep until I reached the bottom of the tub, so that I never had to think about acceptance again, but now I feel like I would be hurting more than just myself, I’d hurt Santa’s feelings too.

I took a deep breath and said Tommy, life is full of obstacles, we were put on earth to grow courage and overcome them. Taking your life is never the answer; it is actually the end of all wonderful things that you could have experienced. Tommy looked up at me and said, well I did not think that I would enjoy experiencing life not being accepted, but I realized that Santa is right. All the kids love him and he isn’t physically fit. I bent over and gave Tommy a hug and made him promise me that whenever he felt life gave him a thousand reasons to cry, to sit and think about a million reasons to smile, the most important one being that Santa and I cared and accepted him.

Later that afternoon I got Tommy’s dad on the phone and had him come meet with me. We spoke about all that occurred. Surprisingly, Tommy’s dad said, he did not know his child felt that way. He said that this was his way of encouraging Tommy to loose a little bit of weight so that he wouldn’t become obese. I explained to Tommy’s dad that kids are encouraged through positive reinforcement rather than insulting comments. I had him speak to the school counselor to help him learn how to go about different lessons with Tommy.

The following day, Tommy came to class with a smile on his face and said, Miss Garcia, My dad and I joined a father and son baseball league. He said this will help him and I stay and shape and we talked after practice and he told me that he loved me and that he apologized for any mean thing he ever told me. He accepts me for me!! Miss Garcia. I smiled, and said, Tommy, if you would have done what you said you were going to do, you would have never lived through this wonderful experience. Tommy’s eyes got watery and he said, Thank you Miss Garcia, I guess I don’t need a mom to feel the love of one.



Research shows that many children commit suicide to escape from a hopeless situation or a horrible state of mind. Only about 10% attempt suicide to get attention. Only 2% saw getting help as the chief reason for trying suicide. The other 88% are the children who truly wanted to die, who are more depressed, more angry, and were more perfectionist. Suicide comes to a child’s mind when he/she feels unwanted by more than 80% of the people they know or care about most, feel neglected by parents and or have no parent support and/or acceptance of what they like or how they act. Most suicides are known to be done with a gun, pills, and/or a rope for hanging. However, Tommy’s attempt was quite rare, his plan actually proves the many thoughts he put into setting this up. All it takes is one person to notice, care, and take action in order to save a child’s life. Kids need attention, love, and acceptance. If a parent does not take action, let’s hope there are many more Miss Garcia’s out there that will help make a difference in a child’s world and save their life.